Sometimes it seems as if relationship and cheating go hand in hand. For me it feels as if everyone I know has been involved on the one side or the other of cheating in a relationship. You will be surprised if you knew some of the people guilty of cheating. In all probability you were on the receiving end yourself that is probably why you are reading this.
There is no getting away from it, cheating hurts. You can really be hurt if someone cheats on you, but surprising enough, the cheater can get hurt as well. The cheater has to do everything in secret and lie a lot. This can really become a problem in a relationship.
The cheater may not seem guilty, but he or she must feel guilty. This will place extra strain on the relationship. Cheating does not have to mean the end of a relationship though. With the right help it can be salvaged.
If you have been in a relationship where you have been cheated on, you will have problems trusting again. Even if you did not break up or if you got back together again, you will have to learn to trust again.
Saving such a relationship is not easy especially if the cheating happened more than once. With the right work on the relationship the trust can be rebuild again. Working at it is well worth it if you think you can be happy again.
The first step is to find out why the person cheated on you. The reason is an important indicator if the person will cheat again. So, it is important that you have a calm discussion about this. You have to hear the other party’s reason and whether it just happened.
If it just happened, or if the person was simply “bored” the chances of it happening again is big. There has to be a better reason why it happened and if there is not, then maybe the relationship is not worth saving. You can only forgive if there was a really good reason for the cheating. Cheating out of boredom is going to lead to cheating again. No relationship can survive under those circumstances.
It is possible, for instant that at the time of the cheating, you were having problems. The person may even have thought the relationship is over. The person may have felt ignored or neglected, those are at least things you can do something about. If you can understand what was going on, at least you have something to work with. No excuse is a reason for cheating, but you need to know so you can prevent it from happening again.
Relationships and cheating will always be with us. Many manage to work through it and the relationship survives. Others simply cannot get over it, they can never trust again and them the relationship cannot be saved. If there is constant distrust or fear, things will fall apart at some stage again.
So, even though relationships and cheating are a curious mix, you can survive it. The important thing is to make sure you understand why it happened and that you will be able to trust again
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Topics: Cheating